Lost innocence
~ A POV written by Kit ~
Prologue: Integra
When I see her, I can’t help but wonder what life would have
been if I was not born a Hellsing or at least if father was not so cruelly taken
from me when I was still a child.
That sunny radiance, even if she walks only by moonlight is
something I can never have. Seras’ carefree
demeanour is something I can never be entitled to for I am a Hellsing, my duty to
my country and my family dictates that my life will be a never ending war against
the scourge of the vampires in this world of mine: truly the burden is mine and
mine alone. I hold my head proud as a Hellsing
would and yet there are times a voice in my head wishes that I had been but an ordinary
woman.
Pah, I will not entertain such foolish thoughts any longer.
I have no time for this, this petty weak
fretting. I am what I am and no amount of
wishing will change it. There is work to
do, undead to hunt down and an extremely difficult vampire to control.
Alucard is bound to aid me in my family’s fight against the
undead. I am his master and I make it a
point to emphasise the fact to him whenever I can. He however, also makes it a point to emphasis at all times how weak
my hold over him really is. I do not doubt
for a moment what his decision with regard my throat will be if ever the seal is
lifted from him.
I do not know how my great grandfather bound him. His journals so precious are lost to us due to
the ravages of time. All I know of the seal
is that I have to feed him constantly despite the great cost of each feeding to
me.
No, it is not the loss of blood that worries me. Afterall, a human may lose up to two-thirds of
his total volume of blood and still live. I worry about my sanity, my will, my humanity. With each feeding, I feel that it is not merely
my blood that he consumes, but my soul as well. Each time he offers to mix our blood, my resolve is less strong than
the last. How long before the candle flame
finally dies?*
I understand that I must fight the darkness. But how is one to fight the darkness within? God forbid that I be the weak chink in the link.
Walter aids me the best he can, but he is
mortal and unless I am kneeled over in battle, I cannot expect my faithful mentor
to always be there for me. He has dedicated
his whole life to my family. I wonder if
he has ever regretted it.
I hear the cry of battle. I cannot wonder how many men I will have to bury when the night is
over? The blood of the righteous is stained
upon my hands; when shall they be clean once more ** ... and yet I must trudge on until we are finally
free of the night.
My father, have I made you proud or have I shamed our family?
---------
* For those familiar with the story of Merlin, a beautiful
virtuous virgin suddenly visited with lustful thoughts had consulted the local priest
on her predicament. She was told that the
devil was seeking access to her chambers and was warned to light a holy candle to
ward him off. While this was initially successful
in warding off the devil, each subsequent attack unfortunately became longer than
the last until the candle could finally no longer last the assault. With the extinguishing of the flame, the devil
entered her room and ravished her. Merlin
was born as a result of the tryst. I like
this legend because after all, Dracula which means “the son of the dragon (most people except Chinese taking dragon = devil)” was later translated by his enemies to mean “the son of the devil”.
** See Lady Macbeth speech before meeting her death at her
own hands.
Chapter 1 -
Vampire Hunter
Her summons are urgent. She tries to downplay it but there is clearly irritation in her voice.
“Meet me at
Cheddar. There has been an attack and the
local police has been overwhelmed. Receive
your orders Alucard, search and destroy.”
Concise and emotionless, as my master’s heart has appeared
to the world for the last decade.
My name is Alucard. I am a vampire. How ironic
is it then that I am bound to the Hellsing family to aid them in their fight against
the undead?
There was a time when this servitude greatly rankled me. Times have however changed. Habit is a strange thing even for my kind. I do not resent this arrangement as much as I
did under her great-grandfather. While my
earlier masters were fools blinded in their quest for the light, my present master
is a creature that both amuses and amazes me: she is no lily, she is a beautiful
nightshade, and just as deadly.
I hear the screams of her doubts when she is sleeping, I hear
the conflict of her fears when she is awake. Soon, my freedom will come. Soon, my quarry will be mine.
----------
Fools, each and every one of them. They know of Hellsing, they know of the consequences
but each pompous fool deems himself capable of dealing with the undead. What for?
The result? More deaths,
more lives lost, the harvest of their vanity. Truly when will this nightmare end? When will we clear our beloved motherland of the scourge of the undead?
----------
Morbidly, there is certain pleasure to be gained from my task
of hunting vermin. Gone are the days when
the undead were true creatures of the night. Those that call themselves “vampire” these days are but poor imitation
of that which was meant to be. Humans are
fond of saying that imitation is the best form of flattery but the vampires that
walk the earth these days are nothing but a mark of shame for those of us who know
better. It thus gives me great pleasure
to show these hapless creatures what a true vampire should be like.
It is the town of Cheddar this time. Apparently, a minister is attacking his congregation,
turning them into mindless ghouls. Worthless
creature, a true vampire does not need to hide behind women and children. The contempt in her voice as she rebukes the local
police for not calling her in earlier greatly amuses me. Her taunting the mayor for having achieved nothing
but to feed his local troops to the undead is most pleasing.
Such beauty, such cruelty and such strength of will. Truly, my master would make a great no life king.
But until she drinks from the cup I hold out to her, I shall have to
be content with my new charge.
The look on her face as Seras informs her that she is now an
undead was priceless.
~ To Be Continued